David: Okay you knuckleheads, let’s shoot to meet somewhere … anywhere … and talk about our once-in-a-lifetime trip to California. (And don’t get on my case about my usage of the phrase, “once-in-a-lifetime.” It IS a once-in-a-lifetime trip. Think about it: even the dump I took this morning was a once-in-a-lifetime dump. But I digress….) It might even be sort-of fun. Let me know what you think.
And Jimmy, replying with “Where’s my ticket” is not going to cut it.
Jack: Either one I can work with. Since we are doing a lot of relaxing we should bring one bag and a backpack that will all be carry on bags.
Jimmy: I would need to do a lunchtime on a Saturday….for a once in a lifetime meeting!!!!
Tommy: Can we all do Saturday at 12:00ish at Stahleys????? This would be good for me since I have a 200 mile round trip to do for this Once-In-A-Lifetime meeting. Haven’t heard from Trains yet.
David: Stahley’s works for me. Trains is sleeping. Trains! WAKE UP!
Jimmy: Tommy ole pal, ole chum which works for you since you are whining about coming 200,000 miles for this-once-in-a-lifetime meeting?????
Tommy: How about this Sunday afternoonish for this once-in-a-lifetime meeting. OR how about tomorrow later in the day, I’d have to fight traffic but I could make it in. Or Nov 25 or Dec 16. And duh I don’t have to drive 200,000 miles…., that’s how far away Guy is.
David: Can’t do the next two weekends at all because I have other once-in-a-lifetime commitments. After that, I’m free for this once-in-a-lifetime meeting. I’d even man up and drive half-way to Harrisburg and meet at a neutral, once-in-a-lifetime location.
Tommy: Ok, for me, since I think this is a good idea to have this meet, I will make whichever date you guys decide…. Even if it’s a Friday. Or even an afternoon weekday.The closer we get to December the shittier the weather will be… for me traveling the 200,000 million miles to this once-in-a-life-time meeting. Oh and I have off tomorrow so if it would happen you decide to meet this weekend (even though David said he can’t) but if you do, then someone has to call me to let me know. 717-732-5699. Ok, Over and out.
David: Lets wait to hear from Trains … and then I’ll see if I can move one of my once-in-a-lifetime commitments to later in my lifetime. I know Friday’s don’t work for Trains because of working the night shift … and he definitely would benefit from this once-in-a-lifetime meeting. Jack and Jimmy, if Trains can make it this Saturday at 12 noon, can you? Also, can I stop saying “once-in-a-lifetime” yet?
Jimmy: Trains Does work Friday nights so he may not be able to do any cause he will be sleepy tired!
David (a few days later): Okay, knuckleheads. It’s confirmed. Saturday, Dec 2nd, noon o’clock, Stahley’s. Bring your steno pads and fountain pens.
Jack: High noon at Stahley’s – the chapter continues . . .
Mid November
Tommy: Hey, I found a place to visit while we’re at Guy’s. Goleta Butterfly Park.
Jimmy: Really!!!!!!!! I would rather visit B. Braun where Jack works and listen to him tell me about his job. Check out the morning call to see his picture today.
David: Oh yeah! (Write your own caption.)
Tommy: “Everybody form a circle
Put your left foot in
Your left arm out
Your left foot in
And shake it all about
You do the hokey pokey
And turn yourself around”
Jack: “This is a happy place to go!”
Jimmy: “See you put on your 3-D glasses then we add the afgana-stand banana-stand in here ….then the flux-capacitater goes thru the combobulater and the milk shake comes out here”.
David:
Tommy: If only there were a market for our witticisms.
Late November
Guy text: Happy thanksgiving. Just trying to enjoy the 85 degrees at the beach weather. Guy gordon max francesca tatianna and lourdes
David text: 85 degrees? Damn. Well, the Beedle family is celebrating the RIGHT way. At a Hockey game. Happy Thanksgiving!
Jack text: I like the CA weather, it’s great for camping.
December 2017
David: My dear Knuckleheads, Set an alarm. Mark your calendar. Write a reminder. Whatever you do, don’t forget.
Tommy: I’ll try and make it, probably, maybe, pretty sure, most likely. However, I may forget because I didn’t place the meeting into my online calendar…… like some.
David: Fellow world travelers, here is a very short, important reminder from your cruise director.
Jimmy: I was waiting for the recalculating directions.
The meeting goes off without a hitch. Tommy rode is Harley in from Harrisburg in freezing temps. Everyone is there. David hands out travel itinerary. Stupidly, no one takes a picture.
Guy text (a few days later): David Just talked to jimmy. Let me know what you guys want to see while your here. My plan is to pick you up at airport. I have a GMC Suburban … and 2 other cars …. I will have off the whole time your here to take care of you and save trains from drowning in the ocean. I will take care of most of the food (bbq) unless Tommy is a vegan now. Costco or bevmo for beers.
Jimmy email: OK boys spoke to Gus this morning…. He has (3) vehicles- Are call on getting a car. Airport is 5 min. from his house. Has 3 Bedrooms and air mattress. He said he found $100.00 on the beach so he will buy the food. Weather- 30-40 at night…60-70 during the day and of course ocean is cold. (3) breweries in walking distance . Beach close. We can have a fire on the beach but said if the Rangers come we have to run. Can go shoot at the range in the Mountains or go to the butterfly park for Tommy. He has a hot tub and neighbors pool is heated.
He said tell Tom nobody likes a snoop.
Tommy: So he can pick us up at the airport? So we wait till we get there to determine if a motel room is needed? So we can use one of his cars for road trips? So we can use the neighbors pool? So we can use his hot tub? … (Told ya he had a hot tub … David, were you even at his house?)
Jack: Wow, the streets are truly paved with gold!
Guy text: Just another day in California. Sunny. 70 degrees and 1/10 inch of cinder snowflakes from the Thomas inferno.
David text: You better have all that swept up by the time we’re out there. No more disasters! I’m sick of this s#!&
Tommy: Is it warm in here or is it just me? For Christmas, I’ll be asking Santa for some asbestos underwares.
Guy: Hey . Snoop er .. Tommy gilbert Go to www.countyofsb.org/asset.c/3443 That map shows history of fires in our area. The gap 2008 was our closest one.We should be good since the other fires already burnt down the fire fuel.
Tommy: So, we should be ok with the not getting burned to a crisp thing…… and I had been planning on packing some hot dogs, oh well..
David: I also believe we’ll be safe because Guy set up cones around his house.
Jack: All, I thought a fire pit would be great for socializing but this is over the top!
Guy: Ahhhhhh nothing but a little ash and smoke. What happened to the ole Staley … let’s get some doggies and go roast em with a beer !!!!!!! Besides makes for great sunrises.
David text: I’m ready for this thing. Only thing I need to see is the beach occasionally. No need to do anything special except hang out with the Hockey House crew, drink some beer, eat some food, and make fun of each other. I’m gonna cancel the car rental since you’ll be our chauffeur. Tommy’s not a vegan … in fact, he only eats raw meat or Dick Inhoffer’s deer jerky. 38 Days and counting!
Guy text: I don’t have CPAP machine handy for trains or potsy … and depending on total mass .. we may not all be able to lounge in hot tub together and still have any water left. I’m getting supplies ready every week. Can’t wait to see everyone.
David text : I have a jar of earplugs I may have to bring along for everyone. Between Trains iron lung machine and Jack’s snoring, the windows will be rattling and your neighbors will be complaining. Can’t believe this is actually happening.
Guy text to David: 2017 christmas card for your visit.
David text to Guy: Excellent. Happy to see your stocking up on the essentials. But I don’t see any hockey socks hanging from the banister.
Guy text to David: Think Tommy Gilbert has all my old “used” equipment ….
David: Shine up your CPAP machine! Ship that tent to Santa Barbara! Pack up those Bobo sneakers!
Jimmy: O my…great picture. By the way bobo wheres my ticket?
David: In case it slipped your mind… TWO WEEKS!
Tommy: I was wondering what the count was. I already have my one pair of underwares packed.
Jimmy: I am packing light…no underwares. Can’t wait to snuggle with one of uses guys.
Part 5: Single Digits