Last Call for 2022

2022 is almost gone.

I’m not here to assess it. It walked in, all full of hope, then did its thing: did some good, then did its damage. And now its leaving. It’s a thing we do — this turn of the end of the year. A big day on the calendar, but just another revolution of this strange planet we live on.

My reemergence here on this blog is part of that end-of-year turn. One, it’s high time I reinvigorate my less-than-stellar attendance, and two, I’d like to talk about what got me back. 

Most days, between the hours of 5am and 7am, I set real life aside in order to get to my creative world. And in 2022, my old brain’s creative focus went toward creating a radio play based on a short story from my Punk Party book.

Why did I do this? It’s obvious to my tens of followers that my blog took a vacation in 2022. I’m still writing, but I wanted to bring the experience of my other life — my work life as a video editor — into my personal creative space. Bringing an original story to life with voices and sound effects and music is something I’ve done before — a million years ago in 1985.

I wanted to do it again. So I did.

I’ve also always wanted to write a Christmas story. So I did.

I also wanted to rope in my family and friends to be voice actors in it. So I did. (Thank you to my talented cast for being so patient with me.)

It became a bigger effort than I imagined. That previous audio play I did in 1985? I wrote about it here, but if I may steal the following passage:

I shake my head in amazement when I think of what it took to put my 1985 radio play together: the hours I spent searching through my school’s sound effects library (vinyl albums!), dropping the needle on countless tracks of door slams and footsteps and crunching noises, begging of my friends to give up a few hours of their Wednesday night so I could embarrass us all by performing my silly story, and the weeks I spent, late at night, alone—editing with magnetic tape and a razor blade.

In today’s world I wouldn’t have to get out of the chair in front of my computer. My friends could stay at home, record their lines on their phones, and email me the audio files. I’d Google “crunching bones sound effect” and have the pick of hundreds of files. Post-production would be done in the blink of an eye.

Ha!

“Blink of an eye‽”

David, you naive old coot. Your powers of estimation are pathetic. Now, don’t get me wrong, I didn’t work on this thing every day. And I hardly touched in over the summer. But really … I started my Christmas-themed radio play in February, and finished it on THE 21st OF DECEMBER.

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Before my big sentimental wrap-up, I must thank the people who put up with my groveling — begging them to be the voices to bring my play to life. When I began putting this show together, for timing purposes I did every voice; played every part. It was horrible, as you could imagine, but the bones were there and I felt I might have something. But only if I could cobble together some home-grown voice actors. Enter: My family.

The only way I could pull this off was to have each person read their lines separately and then edit their performance into the scene, replacing my temporary lines. No one was in the same room playing off another actor’s performance.

My son Max and my daughter-in-law Isabelle played the Bartender and Erin Ryan. I recorded them in August. Max you were great and may have a second career as a bartender if that civil engineering gig ever goes south. Isabelle, I knew you would be great —and you were, because you’re a singer and teacher. Performing is in your blood. My brother Jonathan (recorded in November) humored me and played the disembodied voice of dead-yet-not-quite dead Johnny Sidney, and my sister Helen (recorded in May, I think) took on the massive role of Millie. Nine words, delivered with perfection. My wife Laura (recorded in April) played my wife Mary. Quite a stretch. Thankfully our marriage is working out better than the one in the show. Laura, I would be lost without you. I recorded Kieran Keefe, my nephew, in November. He played a bouncer named “The Refrigerator,” and he didn’t hold back … which was just what I was looking for. The only non-family member in the show is Jim Galley, who played Harry Quinnville. I recorded him at the beginning of December. Jimmy, you were awesome. You came in and read your part like a pro. I think I used every first take you did. Plus I’ve known you forever, so you are family.

The biggest thanks go to my co-stars. My brother-in-law Jack Keefe [recorded in October and then again in November (rewrites!)] played my bumbling, unwilling sidekick Larry Luzinski. I put Jack through the wringer recording his lines — and there were a lot of them. I listen to the final result and it fills me with joy to have us sharing our wacky dialogue together. And then there’s Samantha, my niece. I recorded her in November. I am the luckiest person in town to have an ACTUAL ACTOR (check here and here) do the part of Louise Stapleton, AKA “Bean.” I knew she would be great, I just wasn’t prepared for how great. Samantha, you’d give me three takes on the same line, each one different, each one brilliant. Being able to work with you — have you read lines I had written, and then to live with and edit your performance — it was pure joy. I only wish my writing could measure up.

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Christmas of 2022 has come and gone. My tens of followers got a flurry of blog posts proclaiming the release of my holiday radio play just before Santa’s big day. And now the New Year is about to roll down on us like the unstoppable boulder ready to flatten Indiana Jones in Raiders of the Lost Arc — and it’s up to each one of us to find a way to deal with it.

Until then, it’s that odd take-a-breath week at the end of the year. The Christmas decorations are still up. We continue to remain in holiday mode, and maybe have more time on our hands. To everyone who’s already listened to my 2022 holiday confection, thank you so much. Your comments and reactions were so wonderful and put an extra sparkle in the holiday. If you haven’t yet listened, I hope you’ll consider it. As the proprietor of the Crusader Lounge, Harry Quinnville, says in the final scene, “I’ve arranged a little Christmas gift for you. I think you’ll like it.”

And Happy New Year.